| 12/05/10 | | Storytelling for non-storytellers |
Troy White has just posted a blog which I think is both very good because it encourages people who don't think they are storytellers to have a go and practice, yet I feel doesn't go far enough because there is a chance readers will not get to a story based on his list of triggers. Mind you I think Troy's story prompters are a great place to start. I would like, however, to make some additions to each one to make doubly sure people tell a story rather than just express their opinion. My additions are in red.
- Pet Peeves and when was the last time you felt peeved by them
- Physical Characteristics (Uniqueness) and the times they helped or hindered
- Core Beliefs and how they unfold in practice
- Politics - when have you felt angry, let down or felt like giving them a standing ovation?
- Birthplace - how did you end up being born there?
- What Are You Pathological About? And where do they emerge? What happened last time?
- Religion - has there ever been a time or moment where you were truly thankful for your beliefs?
- Significant Childhood Events
- Beliefs - have they ever got you in trouble?
- Hobbies - when have you felt proudest of your hobbies?
- Education - has your education made a big difference? What happened?
- Skills - Have you ever had a moment when you were surprised by the skills you have or dismally lack?
- Interests - What's your most boring interest and when have you really bored someone with it?
- Family - What are you most fond of about your family? What's an example?
- Talents - Has a talent ever really made a real difference? What happened?
- Life Events You Remember Most
- Adventures You Will Never Forget
- Incompetence At? Share a time when you were a real klutz.
- Anything You Are A Legend Of? When did your legendom shine?
- Successes - What are the three most memorable successes you remember? Take us through what happened.
- Likes - Tell us the last time one of your real likes jumped out and grabbed you?
- Curiosities - What is the weirdest thing you have ever heard happening?
- Failures - What's your biggest stuff up?
- Dislikes - Have you ever felt repulsed by a dislike? Tell us about it.
- Are People Amazed By Anything You Do Or About You? If yes, what happened?
- What Are You Ambitious About? What Fires You Up? When have you been really fired up? What got you going?
- Self Disciplined About? When have you displayed a monk-like discipline.
- People Are Envious Of You Because _______? When has someone been envious of you?
- Do People Desire What You Have? When have people desired what you have?
To get to a story you need to get to a time and a place. When and where questions are good. Asking what happened works. Just asking for an example can work if you can get people to provide a detailed example. Troy's prompters point us in the right direction for finding our own stories. My additions hopefully will increase the chances that a story will be told.
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| 20/04/10 | | Finding Stories |
We start most of our projects by collecting stories. We collect stories in groups (using anecdote circles) and one-on-one. We've learned a lot about getting people comfortable, building trust and asking questions that elicit stories. There's still a lot to learn. A couple of weeks ago something happened while filming stories for a mentoring program we're creating for a client. And since we had a camera at the time we filmed my recollection of what happened.
Time is important and so is your intent.
Paul Cooper over at SMS Consulting Group shared with me this simple way of thinkng about trust.
TRUST = (credibility + reliability + intimacy) / intent
I like it. For one thing, I can remember it and after all the trust-related literature I've read over the years I think it describes the important elements (btw when I first saw the formula depiction I initially recoiled. "Trust can't be a simple formula." I got over it.)
When collecting stories you need to start with a warm up. Back in 2004 I described what the warm up looks like when collecting stories. All those ideas still hold true but I would like to emphasise INTENT. Your storyteller must know you have a good intent and that you will safeguard the stories and the storytellers. . When we collect stories we make it clear how we intend to retell the stories and whether we have their permission.
A couple of weeks ago I attended a teleconference with Doug Lipman on story elicitation (he's running some courses on this topic too). He's also noticed that business books that talk about the importance of questions often neglect story-eliciting questions. There are a few good places to find story-eliciting questions. You can check out our Questions category on this blog. And just yesterday I was reminded by @AmandaFenton about StoryCorps' story collection guide.
Doug's talk cover the 7 things not to do when collecting stories.
1. Don't compromise safety.
Ensure the storyteller understands your goals and how the stories will be used. I've had times when a storyteller has revealed something that could be career-limiting an we have removed the story at their request.
2. Don't show delight
You must be interested in the stories they are telling. If they think you are not interested you end up getting high-level, shortened versions just so they can get it all done and get out of their.
3. Don't enter the imagined world they are creating for you in the story
Your interest and delight will be a function of how much you let the story transport you to the experience they are recounting.
4. Don't be a slave to your questions
Often someone will tell you a story which will prompt new questions and avenues of investigation. You need to listen carefully too because there is nothing worse that asking a question that has already been answered in a previous story.
5. Fail to pursue scenes
The best stories have details. Details create imagery that creates context, adds authenticity and makes the story memorable. So as the interviewer it's important to pursue these specific scenes: one day, in one place, one person, did one thing (OK, that's an exaggeration but you get my drift).
6. To not hypothesise the storyline
I think what Doug meant here is to ask follow up questions in the pursuit of details such as "so that was adversely effecting your relationship?" If that is not the case then your hypothesis was wrong and the storyteller can correct you.
7. Hijacking the story
Taking over the story and telling it your way. I think some trained journalists do this. I was speaking at a conference this year and the facilitator quickly interviewed me so she could introduce me. What I said and then the story she told didn't match in my mind. When this happens the storyteller loses control and is no longer a collaborator in the process.
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| 17/02/10 | | Some tips for capturing stories on video |
A few nights ago I watch Changeling starring Angelina Jolie. It's directed by Clint Eastwood (has he ever directed a dud movie?) and I was fascinated by a short documentary we found in the DVD extras where Clint explained why he never calls out 'Action' when directing a scene. As an actor Clint found a director's call to 'Action' off putting. He was immediately reminded that he was an actor, acting and his performance suffered. Instead Clint calmly and quietly says things like, "OK, in your own time ..." or "when you are ready ..."
I'll add that advice to my repertoire of tips for getting people to tell their stories on video. I like to use my Flip Video to make rough and ready clips. Here are the seven things I keep in mind when filming:
- Sit the person in front of plain background--you don't want to be distracted by what's behind the storyteller
- Have light come in from the side (sit them next to a window) to give their face more depth. But not in direct sunlight.
- Hold the camera as still as I can.
- Start filming well before you ask the person to recount their experience and engage them in some idle chit chat. This gets them used to being filmed.
- Keep the camera as close to my face as possible and tell the storyteller to tell me, not the camera, the story. Ask them to look me in the eye. With the camera close by it will look like they are looking at the camera.
- Keep filming after they finish their story. You never know what they will say after they relax and then there is plenty of space to edit the ending.
- Try to avoid making noise and nodding while they are telling their story (hard to do). Otherwise your sounds and movement also get captured.
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| 16/11/09 | | The role scripts play in finding stories |
Everyday we tell those closest to us (our family, friends, colleagues) about what happened to us: today, yesterday, last week. Occasionally we'll reminisce about the old days but for those we know well what's worth recounting, what's remarkable, is happening on a daily basis. We don't even need to tell the whole story because the people we know well have much of the background. We tell the smaller details that wouldn't make sense or be interesting to someone we didn't know that well. The storytelling is gradual.
Imagine you grew up without knowing anything about restaurants. You've never heard of them, never seen them and have never had an experience, apart from eating a meal at home, that is anything like going to a restaurant. Then one day a friend takes you to one and you can't believe that you can just order your meal, that waiters bring your meal and clear away all the dirty dishes. For you this is truly remarkable and if someone ask you to share your experience you could do it without hesitation.
For those people who go to restaurants regularly much of the experience is invisible. We're not surprised by waiters, menus, asking for the bill, etc.. We have developed a script for what a restaurant experience will be like and we will only notice things if something unexpected happens. These scripts are important. Without them we would have to think through everything. It would be exhausting.
Important knowledge, however, resides in the scripts. It's difficult to recount stories for someone who is not close about what you do day-in, day-out. You're not sure they care about the small stories you tell to those people who see you every day. There is an art to collecting stories, especially the small ones.
I mention this conumdrum because just knowing that stories can get converted to scripts will help anyone who is trying to elicit stories to go beyond what's remarkable to a stranger. For a long time I was flummoxed at times during an anecdote circle when the participants could only give you broad illustrations of what they did at work rather than specific anecdotes. It didn't happen often but when it did I couldn't explain it. With this explanation I do three things to find the small stories.
- be truly interested in every detail. Curiosity must exude from your pores
- use memory triggers: timelines, artefacts, pictures
- get peers together in the anecdote circle
The next frontier for me will be cognitive task analysis. I have Crandall, Klein and Hoffman's book, Working Minds and I'm looking forward to learning more about the techniques.
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| 16/09/09 | | Random thoughts on anecdotes |
Here are some thoughts/experiences from last week regarding anecdotes, how to elicit them and story-telling
- Last Wednesday I listened to Alana, an Aboriginal lady, tell a traditional teaching story and we chatted afterwards. In organisations we generally see stories morph over time, with details changing but much of the meaning being retained. Alana explained that this is not what happens with traditional aboriginal stories. She had been given permission to tell the story with the strict understanding that she would re-tell the story precisely as it had been told to her. By insisting on the exact reproduction of the story the meaning is much less likely to change over time and in this way knowledge can be passed faithfully from generation to generation.
- Shawn and I have the general view that 'how' and 'why' questions will normally elicit opinions and generalisations rather than anecdotes. 'When' and 'where' questions are generally better at generating experiences. Also on Wednesday, I heard a 'how' question that is fantastic to get anecdotes: 'How did you meet Grandma?' The great thing about this question is that it takes you to a very specific event and it can't help but result in an anecdote (unless Grandpa is in a grumpy mood).
- A lady told me how she had been nearly hit by a Sydney Buses bus as she was on a roundabout. Instead of indicating he had made a mistake, the driver made a gesture that she interpreted as "tough cookies". Furious, she took down the bus number and by 4.30 that afternoon had sent an email to Sydney Buses complaining. By 9.30am the next day she had a response confirming that they expected high standards of driving behaviour and that the incident she described was unacceptable. They had identified the driver and organised to meet with him that day discuss the matter. She spoke very highly of Sydney Buses as a result, thought they were doing a good job. It goes to show, anger dissipates when people are listened to...
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| 13/01/09 | | For job hunters—finding and telling better stories |
More people will be looking for jobs this year. Sadly unemployment is rising. Getting a job interview will be tough so it will be doubly important to make the best possible impression as the interviewer pokes and probes to get an idea of who you are and whether you’ll fit in.
Job interviewers these days know the importance of stories. They know that stories give a good insight into your capabilities and experience. They call it behavioural interview technique, which is just a fancy title for collecting stories from you. So you’d better have some stories to tell that reveal your character, skills and attitude to life.
Many people talk about stories but I’m continuously surprised how many of these people can’t differentiate between a story and an opinion. This is important because you need to know what a story is so you know what you are looking for.
Here’s a simple rule of thumb for identifying stories: if what you are saying starts with a time marker such as, “In 2003 ...” or “Three months ago ...,” then there is a good chance you're telling a story. If after that time marker you recount a series of events, one connected to the next, then you are telling a story.
The previous 4 paragraphs do not contain a single story. Here is an example of a story (personal experience, an anecdote):
I ran my first anecdote circle in 2000 while working for IBM. I was helping Land and Water Australia develop their knowledge strategy and my first session was with a group of CSIRO scientists. Before the session I remembered the advice given to me by my colleague, Sharon Darwent. She said: “Just be comfortable with any silences and when someone provides an opinion ask for an example.” So I started the session and ask my first question. Everyone just looked at each other in complete silence. I held my nerve for what seemed liked an eternity and eventually one of the scientists spoke up with a sigh, “OK, I’ll go first ...” After that the stories flowed. They went for a couple of hours non-stop.
You can see the video version of me telling this story on YouTube.
Finding our own stories
There are two ways we remember our experiences: attached to emotions or attached to imagery. Therefore we need to use both to recount what we know.
Start by drawing a timeline of your career. Plot the significant events (work and personal) and jot down next to the events how you remember feeling: excited, angry, pumped, disappointed.
When an event springs to mind recount it out loud to yourself, or even better, tell it to someone. Avoid writing these recollections down verbatim. Just right some rough notes. Otherwise the temptation is to recount the experience they way you’ve written it which will sound unnatural.
You should have 4 or 5 stories now. Let’s switch to visual queues to remember some more. Head over to flickr or iStockphoto and select 30 images at random. Look at each one and see if any experiences spring to mind. Again recount them and jot down some rough notes.
One of the best ways to remember your own stories is to hear others. Find a couple of colleagues, friends and just get reminiscing about the good old days. Make notes about any anecdote that springs to mind about your own experiences at work focusing on the ones that set you apart. In fact you should always carry a story notebook to jot them down because they often creep up on you by surprise and I will guarantee you will forget it instantly if you don’t either write it down of have the opportunity to tell the story a couple of times.
Practising and improving your stories
Your first retellings will tend to be rambling and, quite frankly, boring. The rambling nature of the story, however, is often reduced by telling the story to people and watching their response. Getting feedback in the form of their response to your story (facial expressions, comments - nothing formal) will tell you what to keep and what to jettison. But you can do more.
You can increase the impact of any story in three ways:
- be specific and avoid generalisations. Instead of saying, “I once worked for company that sold database software.” Say, “While the pre-sales manager at Oracle Systems ...”
- the story has to about a specific individual trying to achieve something, ideally with some obstacle that they eventually overcame. Avoid stories about companies, departments and even teams. Tell stories about people who have names. Instead of saying, “In 2004 the risk assessment team was facing a problem ...,” say “Charles Kleiner in risk assessment was facing a problem.” And of course you were instrumental in helping Charles overcome this obstacle.
- help people visualise what’s happening. The best stories are ones that the listener can picture vividly in their mind’s eye. Instead of of saying, “We drove up to the vineyard ...,” say “We drove up to an adobe-style vineyard with acres of vines all around us ...”
Every story we tell gives people an insight into who we are. They are quite revealing. So before you tell them to an interviewer it’s a good idea to tell your stories to a friend and ask them about the qualities they inferred about you based on the story. Is it resilience, courage, persistence, creativity etc.? You will surprised to find that a story which you thought, for example, was about persistence, comes across to the listener as arrogance. You will want to avoid those ones.
Speaking of things to avoid, no one want to hear your life story. They can read that in your resume. They want to hear about the specific moments in your life where you made a difference. Use your stories.
Now you should have a dozen good stories to tell at the interview. Practise them whenever you can. In casual conversations, when the time is right, say something like, “Yes, that reminds me of ...” By practising your stories in natural, conversational settings you will be in a better position to repeat your story in this natural way at the interview which will convey tremendous confidence.
Good luck with the job hunt and let me know whether your storytelling efforts made a difference.
I would like to thank Michael Specht from our Jelly coworking group who pointed out to me the increase need for job hunters to be able to better find and tell their stories.